Friday, August 01, 2014

Spam email of the week

Subject: VL:  shortest delivery time

I don't care how you get here (or what you are)
Just get here if you can (shortest delivery time)

Nice day to you friend,o(≧v≦)o~~

I don't know what emotion that is trying to conv-

Here below are our latest information for Wuhan New G603, welcome to check as quality reference.

OK.

Our advantage of G603:
●Good news!!!  To celebrate our start for new factory and quarry of G603, now we have stock for G603 slabs size in 240upx70upx2cm and 240upx70upx3cm are under selling, quality is as good as before and price will be also attractive..


Good news? More like GREAT news! About to get my G603 slab on. But wait, hold up - didn't Wuhan New G603 experience some problems in the past? I remember at the time feeling very o(≧v≦)o~~ about that.

● No delivery time problems any more: apart from our own quarry in Wuhan, we have our own factories and several cooperated factories help us manufacturing. Delivery time should be put off a lot if buy from other trade company. And in fact, there are many companies from China are also purchasing from our company. Our shortest delivery time for 2x20'container is 10-15days.

What do we want?

2X20-FOOT CONTAINER SLAB THINGS

When do we want 'em?

IN 10-15 DAYS

Delivery time should be put off a lot if buy from other trade company.

Other trade company be like, "Whaaaaaaa? OH NO HE D'-ANT." But the thing is, oh yes - he did. Other trade company just got served.

● No LCL problems any more: brought in machine for big slabs in Wuhan factory, big slabs can be exported toghther with other products from Wuhan port.

It seems like Wuhan New G603 has experienced mad problems in the past, son, and I'm wondering if this email is part of some extremely well put together PR campaign trying to convince me - your average Joe slab purchaser - that everything is OK. I am going to tread lightly here.

● Most favorable price: our best price for G603 will be last until the end of this month, due to we are willing to offer the biggest support for our customers to test market acceptance of new G603 in their market.

Forget it, I'm all in. SOLD. Those words made too much sense not to convince me. It was borderline spiritual. After all, the Wuhan bible states: "the best price shall be last and the worst price shall be first (until the end of this month)."

Here's the thing though - and I'm not trying to be rude - but do you have photographic evidence that you carry the type of slabs I am looking for? I am quite picky when it comes to slabs. I like them grey and extra slabby.


OH SNAP

*Missy Elliot voice*

GET YOUR SLAB ON

GET-GET YOUR SLAB ON



#SLABLIFE

CRATE 'EM UP, YO


LOAD 'EM ON THE SLAB TRUCK - SEE YOU IN 10-15 DAYS, SLABS


OOPS, NSFW

So, if you are worring about delivery time, or searching for a professional supplier for new G603, hurry to contact with Connie. Our company and I will offer our biggest support for you!

Wait, I just realized I don't need any slabs. This is a newspaper.

Well, waiting for your news.

Dang, Wuhan, chill! This is some serious #slabpressure. OK fine, I'll take all the slabs. #slabking

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