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Teaser links of the week

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ME: /AIMLESSLY WANDERING INTERNET/ I WONDER IF OLD PEOPLE CAN DO COOL EXERCISES




THIS FIX LOOKS NEITHER SIMPLE NOR RELATED TO CONSTANT FATIGUE BUT OK GUNDRY MD




FEELS LIKE EVERY GUNDRY MD-SPONSORED TEASER FEATURES A PICTURE OF AN OLD PERSON CONTORTING HIMSELF NO MATTER WHAT THE HEADLINE IS

"SQUIRRELS MORE RABID THAN LAST YEAR CLAIM TREATMENT EXPERTS" /PICTURE OF MAN IN PRETZEL POSITION SUCKING HIS OWN BIG TOE/

ANYWAY, LOVE HOW 'PUBLISHES RESULTS' IS TRYING TO LEND LEGITIMACY TO SOMETHING CALLED 'ENERGY COCKTAIL' AND THIS PHOTO

"SUBJECT A (ME) CONSUMED ENERGY COCKTAIL AGAIN ON DAY THREE, IMMEDIATELY FELT URGE TO PERFORM CIRCUS TRICKS NEAR CENTRAL PARK; SUBJECT A (ME) BOTH POOPED AND SPLIT PANTS DURING THIS EXERCISE; WILL RETURN TO THE LAB FOR ADDITIONAL FINDINGS"




SEE NOW *THIS* LOOKS LIKE THE RESULTS YOU WANT FROM THE ENERGY COCKTAIL

THERE'S JUST GOTTA BE A WANNABE TAP-DANCING GRANDPA WHO WAS WAITING TO GO VIRAL OUT THERE SEEING THIS LIKE OH YOU GO…

Teaser links of the week

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HARD TO BELIEVE A SITE CALLED GRADUATEZ HAS A TYPO IN A TEASER LINK AD

OTHER THAN THAT THO EVERYTHING MAKES SENSE AND IS REAL

I HAVE NOT BEEN FISHING IN LIKE 15 YEARS BUT I WANT TO GO AGAIN JUST SO I CAN TAKE PICTURES AND CREATE A GOOGLE PHOTO ALBUM WITH THIS TITLE




OBSERVATIONS:

WHAT
THAT IS ONE HELLUVA FOOT
THAT IS ONE HELLUVA DOCTOR
WHY IS THE DOCTOR SO HAPPY ABOUT THE PAINFUL FOOT CRACKS
WHO KNEW THAT PAINFUL FOOT CRACKS COULD BE SOMETHING TO WORRY ABOUT- USUALLY PAIN MEANS EVERYTHING IS OK
WOULD HAVE GONE WITH "THESE PICTURES WAS TAKEN JUST A SECOND BEFORE HAVING PAINFUL FOOT CRACKS STOPPED BEING FUN"




AS SOMEONE WHO HAS SPENT A LIFETIME SCOURING BARNS FOR RARE AND INCREDIBLE FINDS, I FEEL BAD FOR THE PERSON WHO HAD TO WHITTLE THIS DOWN TO 50

I TYPED THAT VERY SENTENCE FROM A DOPE WORD PROCESSOR I FOUND TUCKED IN THE CORNER OF A HORSE STABLE IN '97

IT WAS COVERED IN HORSE POOP BUT WHO'S LAUGHING NOW

ANYWAY JUDGING BY THIS PICTURE, YEAH MOTOR HAS EXPANDED THE DEFI…

Facebook meme of the week

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HOW IS THIS REAL

IS ANYONE GOING TO SAY SOMETHING OR ARE WE JUST GOING WITH THIS

JUST GOING WITH IT? OK




UH IS THIS COMMENT FROM HEAVEN

THEY DON'T HAVE SPELL CHECK UP THERE? DANG




DOESN'T MATTER, YOU CAN STILL PAY YOUR RESPECTS TO THEM BY DRESSING UP LIKE ODIE FOR HALLOWEEN THIS YEAR, I MEAN C'MON




WITH GARFIELD AS MY WITNESS I WILL MAKE IT MY LIFE'S WORK TO ENSURE THAT NO ONE EVER FORGETS GRANDMA TWEETY

#REMEMBERGRANDMATWEETY

SO IS THIS MEME TARGETED ONLY AT GRANDPARENTS NAMED AFTER CARTOON CHARACTERS

BECAUSE THEN IT ALMOST MAKES SENSE




WE CAN'T SAY AMEN ANYMORE?

FIRST THEY TAKE CHRIST OUT OF CHRISTMAS AND NOW THIS




NO MEME IS EVER TRULY FULFILLED UNTIL SH HUMES VISITS THE COMMENTS AND DROPS SOME REALNESS




WE CAN'T SAY THAT ANYMORE




MISS MY LITTLE GRANDMA
ONLY GRANDMA I HAD
NEVER HAD A GRANDPA
WOULDA LOVED HIM SO BAD

CHORUS: LITTLE GRANDMA, LITTLE GRANDMA, THAT'S WHAT EVERYBODY CALLED HER/LITTLE GRANDMA, LITTLE GRANDMA, SHE WAS SUCH A BALLER

I DON'T KNOW

SO J…

Teaser links of the week

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IS IT GRILLED CORN ON THE COB

I WOULD BET ANYTHING IT'S GRILLED CORN ON THE COB

JUST IN CASE I HAVE DISPOSED OF ALL MY GRILLED CORN ON THE COB

THANK YOU GUT DOCTOR

WHY DOES THE YELLOW OUTLINE OF GUT DOCTOR STOP AT THE TOP OF HIS HEAD

MIKE "I BEG SMARTCONSUMERTODAY TO COMPLETE OR THROW OUT THIS OUTLINE OF GUT DOCTOR NOW"

IS THIS VEGETABLE DISPOSAL DEMAND APPLICABLE TO SAY, GERMANS

"I AM GUT DOCTOR TO AMERICANS ONLY, MAGA" - GUT DOCTOR

(MAKE AMERICAN GUTS ACCEPTABLE)

ALSO THE GUT DOCTOR IS SASHA BARON COHEN, I'VE BEEN HAD




BUT I AM 40

THE ONLY THING BETTER THAN THIS HEADLINE IS THE PICTURE OF GOOD BREASTS THAT ACCOMPANIES IT

DJ RED ALERT SPINNING AT HEALTH CENTRAL EXPO AT THE JAVITS CENTER: GOOD BREASTS AT 50 STARTS WHEN /HOLDS MIC OUT TO CROWD/

CROWD: NOW

DJ RED ALERT: /SCRATCHES/ WHEN

CROWD: NOW

DJ RED ALERT: /SCRATCHES/ "LET ME CLEAR MY-" /SCRATCHES/ "BREASTS"

CROWD: GOES WILD




MICHAEL J FOX, TREE, SKY, BOOM- NEXT




THESE GOOD BREASTS AT 20 ARE …

Facebook meme of the week

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I HONESTLY DON'T UNDERSTAND THE CLOWN

BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT ALL MORNING

CAN'T GET OVER IT




BIG VACATION

HOW IS "VACATION" ONE OF THE HANDFUL OF WORDS SPELLED CORRECTLY HERE

"ADDERLEY ADDERLEY NEEDS A BIG VACATION" SOUNDS LIKE AN INDIE TEEN COMEDY THAT DEBUTED AT CANNES




THIS VACATION OF A THING

THANK YOU FOR RESTATING THIS MEME IN A WAY THAT MAKES CONSIDERABLY LESS SENSE

BUT HEY AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T USE A CLOWN TO MAKE YOUR POINT

SCORE ONE FOR "LISHA" A REAL PERSON




OH WORD

THE LONGEST I'VE EVER DONE FOOT IS 6 DAYS SO KUDOS TO YOUR DAUGHTER

WORTH NOTING THAT THIS GLORIOUS TYPO IS THE RESULT OF A WOMAN NAMED CLARALYN MCCLAIN ATTEMPTING TO COMMENT ON A CLOWN-BASED PRO-KIDNAPPING MEME IN ORDER TO INFORM THE WORLD THAT HER DAUGHTER HAD A GREAT TIME ON VACATION

I WANT TO HANG THIS COMMENT OVER THE FIREPLACE AND SIP BRANDY WHILE WAITING FOR DINNER GUESTS TO ASK ME ABOUT IT

I'VE BEEN TRYING TO MAKE UP PRETEND CLARALYN MCCLAIN-BASED HEADLINES AN…

Facebook memes of the week

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FINALLY A MEME FOR PEOPLE WHO COOK WHILE STANDING

AND FOR PEOPLE WHO ENJOY SUSPENSE BECAUSE FOR ME THIS STORY HAD A SURPRISE ENDING

I HONESTLY THOUGHT SHE WAS GOING TO SIT DOWN

BUT EVEN IF THIS MEME READ "SHE COOKS FOR PEOPLE AND THEN SITS DOWN" I WOULD HAVE THE SAME REACTION I'M HAVING NOW, WHICH IS: OKAAAAAY

AND YET IF I SHARED THIS MEME ON INSTAGRAM MY MOTHER-IN-LAW WOULD BREAK THROUGH THE GLASS OF THE PHONE TRYING TO LIKE IT AS HARD AS POSSIBLE

THEN SHE WOULD COMMENT FROM A SECONDARY DEVICE "YOU GOT THAT RIGHT MIKE WE NEVER GET TO SIT DOWN OH THIS IS SO TRUE (PASTA EMOJI) (PRAYING HANDS EMOJI) (HEART EMOJI) (AFRICAN AMERICAN SNOWBOARDER EMOJI THAT WAS A MISTAKE)"

THEN SHE WOULD ASK MY WIFE "WHERE DID MIKE GET THAT GREAT PICTURE HE POSTED ABOUT COOKING AND NOT SITTING DOWN AND HOW CAN I GET IT ON MY PHONE SO I CAN SHOW THE GIRLS AT LUNCH TOMORROW"

THEN MY WIFE WOULD BE LIKE "MA! HE SHARED IT IRONICALLY BECAUSE IT'S SO WEIRD AND STUPID&quo…

Facebook meme of the week

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WOW THIS IS TWO MEMES ROLLED INTO ONE

A "WE'RE ALL CRAZY" MEME *AND* A "GOOD MORNING, HAPPY WEDNESDAY" MEME

AND IF YOU SEPARATE THE LATTER WE'RE TALKING A THREE-MEME MEME, UNPRECEDENTED

COULDN'T HAVE PICKED A BETTER ANIMAL TO FEATURE AS EVERYONE KNOWS THAT SQUIRRELS = CRAZY AND ALSO WEDNESDAY

WHAT DO PEOPLE THINK OF THIS GENRE-DEFYING MEME




SEEMS LIKE EVERYONE IS ON BOARD WITH THIS MEME, ALBEIT CLEARLY LEANING TOWARD THE GOOD MORNING PORTION

CONGRATULATIONS TO EVERYONE WHO BET THE UNDER ON WHEN WE'D SEE THE WORD "BLESSED" IN THE COMMENTS OF THIS CRAZY SQUIRREL/WEDNESDAY MEME, WHICH VEGAS SET AT "FIFTH COMMENT"




LISTEN ELEONORE THAT'S NOT EVEN A SENTENCE AND YOU CAN'T BRING COFFEE INTO THE EQUATION HERE-- THIS MEME IS TAKING ON TOO MUCH AS IT IS




I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS

BUT TWO PEOPLE LIKED IT SO I'LL LET IT STAND




SIMMER DOWN TANYA, DANG

ONLY I CAN TALK LIKE THIS




OK I GUESS

THE THEME OF THIS MULTI-MESSAGED MEME …