Posts

Grandma memes of the week

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FOUND A PAGE ON FACEBOOK CALLED "I'M A GRANDMA. I LOVE MY GRANDKIDS"

GREAT NAME FOR A FACEBOOK PAGE

BETTER MEMES

LET'S GO




DID A GROOVY OLD GRANDMA WRITE THIS



NORMALLY I FEEL LIKE THAT STATEMENT IS HYPERBOLIC BUT IN THIS CASE I AGREE!!!!!


WHO IS MESSING WITH THE GRANDBABES



PLEASE LEAVE THE GRANDBABES ALONG

ACTUALLY NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT ONE TIME I SAW A GRANDBABE GET ROASTED FOR HAVING A BIG FOREHEAD AND OUT OF NOWHERE THIS OLDER WOMAN HOLDING A GLASS OF MERLOT JUST STARTED DROP-KICKING THESE NINE-YEAR-OLDS IN THE FACE

SO THIS IS GRAMMATUDE I REMEMBER THINKING TO MYSELF AT THE TIME

ANYWAY THIS IS ALL COMING BACK TO ME NOW, NOT SURE WHY I NEVER MENTIONED IT

GROSS

WHAT EVEN IS THIS, WHO IS THIS FOR





I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS AT ALL




MAINLY AT THE MOMENT I AM STRUGGLING WITH GRANDMA MEMES THAT DON'T MAKE ANY SENSE

BUT ALSO, AS A GRANDMA, I AM STRUGGLING WITH FINDING A MEME THAT COMBINES MY LOVE OF FRIDAY AND MY FABULOUSNESS AT BEING A GRANDMA




WOW THANK YOU, THIS H…

Instagram account of the week

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DO YOU LIKE LIONS

I MEAN WHO DOESN'T LIKE LIONS, AMIRITE FOLKS

BUT DO YOU LIKE LIONS AS MUCH AS *THIS* GUY

DOUBTFUL



WE'VE ALL HAD DREAMS OF DEDICATING OUR INSTAGRAM FEEDS ALMOST EXCLUSIVELY TO LION MEMES, BUT ALAS #LIFE GETS IN THE WAY

THANKFULLY THERE IS A ONE-STOP SHOP FOR ALL OF YOUR LION CONTENT

NO LION CAN BE KING WITHOUT HIS LIONESS

SO TRUE (?)

WANNABE KING WHO DOESN'T WANT TO SETTLE DOWN WITH A GOOD WOMAN SCROLLING THROUGH INSTAGRAM AND SEEING THIS MEME: WOW, I NEED TO CHANGE MY #LIFE

DIFFICULT TO IMAGINE A MORE INSPIRING LION MEME


I STAND CORRECTED

EVEN THE LION IS MOTIVATED BY THESE WORDS

"I DON'T HAVE THE STRENGTH TO GO ON FOR SOME REASON, BUT I MUST BECAUSE I AM A LION" - THIS LION

BY THE WAY THIS MEME WAS SENT TO THIS GUY-- HE DIDN'T PURSUE IT ON HIS OWN

LION MEMES JUST TEND TO FIND HIM, IT'S ALL A COINCIDENCE



THIS IS CLEARLY THE SAME WIND MACHINE BEYONCE USED AT COACHELLA BUT I'LL LET IT SLIDE

IS THERE SUCH THING AS A LION MEME INTERVE…

Facebook memes of the week

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I REMEMBER THIS QUOTE FROM THE MOVIE SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DWARFS

HORNY DWARF WAS REALLY PUT IN HIS PLACE AS A RESULT





THE MEME SO NICE SHERRY AMEN-ED IT TWICE



HMMM TOUGH ONE BUT I THINK THE RAPIST WILL BE TO BLAME

CAN I GET AN AMEN



THANK YOU

ALL OF THESE AMENS ARE IMPORTANT- ESPECIALLY HLOKS HLOKOLOZA LEKGARI'S OBVIOUSLY- BUT IT WOULD MEAN A LOT TO HEAR WHAT BETTY BOOP THINKS



WOW I AM SO HUMBLED

THANK YOU BETTY BOOP AND THANK YOU JAN

BETTY BOOP IS FAMOUS FOR NOT BEING A WEIRD-ASS BIG-HEADED CARTOON WITH A MIDDLE PART WHO FLAUNTS HER SEXUALITY

THIS WOULD BE LIKE DAFFY DUCK HAVING A MEME THAT SAID "STOP SPINNING AROUND LIKE A LUNATIC AND SMELL THE ROSES" AND THE TASMANIAN DEVIL WAS LIKE "AMEN"

THAT WAS MY STRAINED SEGUE TO THE NEXT MEME





WHAT

THE POLICE CALLED YOU INSTEAD OF THE ESCAPEE'S IMMEDIATE FAMILY TO TELL YOU THAT ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS ESCAPED "FROM MENTAL HOSPITAL" BECAUSE THE POLICE KNEW THAT THIS PERSON WAS YOUR FRIEND BUT THEY DIDN'…

Nextdoor posts of the week

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DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT DAY IS HO HO HO AND WHAT TIME HE WILL COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY



BEEN THINKING A LOT ABOUT THIS AND I HAVE TO SAY, OF THE TWO COMMENTS HERE SUZANNAH HAS PROVIDED THE BETTER ADVICE

WHEN BEING FORCED TO MAKE AN EXCRUCIATING DECISION ABOUT POSSIBLY HAVING TO GIVE UP THE FAMILY PET, YOU WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU SEEK THE MOST TRUSTED SOURCE OF VALUABLE, WISE, AND EMPATHETIC COUNSEL, WHICH IS THE SAME SITE WHERE YOU CAN BUY ADULTS DIAPERS ON THE CHEAP




"CAN'T TALK NOW, I HAVE TO LOG ON TO NEXTDOOR.COM TO ONE-UP THIS FROG JOKE" - ALYSON

PLEASE DON'T ENCOURAGE THIS, HARRIET

I DON'T THINK A FROG IS PEST BTW



"WENT TO BUY LONGJOHNS AND ACCIDENTALLY BOUGHT A GOLDEN TWIN CANOPY BED"

"I'VE BEEN INFORMED IT'S TOO EXPENSIVE TO RETURN"

ALL OF THIS CHECKS OUT



NOT GONNA CLICK "SEE MORE" BECAUSE THIS IS PERFECT

MARY MARY QUITE CONTRARY
HOW DID YOUR FRIEND'S YARD SALE GO
DID SHE SELL SILVER BELLS AND COCKLE SHELLS
OR DID NO ONE …

Facebook meme of the week

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TIME FOR ANOTHER 'DO YOU LIKE FOOD' MEME



GREAT QUESTION

[THE "FRIED" IS CAPITALIZED BECAUSE THIS GUY MADE THE CHICKEN]

LET'S HEAR IT FROM THE TOP FANS FIRST, THEY'VE WORKED HARD FOR THIS







THEY DIDN'T BECOME TOP FANS FOR NOTHING, FOLKS



ANY GOOD BOATING PARTY IS JUST OVERFLOWING WITH SOUTHERN FRIED CHICKEN

LOVE TO BE ON A BOAT OUT ON THE BAY, STARING AT A BEAUTIFUL SUNSET WHILE TAKING A HUGE GNARLY BITE OFF A SOUTHERN FRIED CHICKEN LEG, TOSSING THE DRUMSTICK INTO THE WATER, COUNTING MY BLESSINGS




COUSIN'S MOTHER-IN-LAW SOUTHERN FRIED CHICKEN IS THE BEST SOUTHERN FRIED CHICKEN AND THE ONLY KIND I'LL TOLERATE

ME: /AT THANKSGIVING DINNER (ON A BOAT), SCANNING TABLE FULL OF BUCKETS OF SOUTHERN FRIED CHICKEN, LOOKING PROUDLY AT FAMILY, BUT GROWING CONFUSED/ WHERE IS MY COUSIN'S MOTHER-IN-LAW

WIFE: UGH, FOR THE TENTH TIME WE DID NOT INVITE HER, WHAT IS YOUR DEAL

ME: YOU CALL THIS A 'FAMILY?' CANCEL THANKSGIVING, AND WHO EVEN MADE THIS /THROWS CHICK…

Nextdoor post of the week

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THUS CONCLUDES JULIEANN'S ONE-WOMAN PERFORMANCE OF "sENIOR HELP" 👏👏👏

MY FAVORITE PART WAS WHEN JULIEANN SAID "I WILL DO FOR SENIORS GROCERY SHOPING"

I LAUGHED, I CRIED

THE REVIEWS ARE IN FOLKS

"WHEN IT'S TIME TO GO TO THE DOCTOR, I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO RELYING ON SOMEONE WHO CANNOT OPERATE A CAPS LOCK KEY" - GLORIA, 89

"FIVE STARS. MY ONLY QUESTION IS WHETHER JULIEANN IS NEAR ROUTE 9" - FRANK, 91

"I CALLED THE NUMBER BUT IT IS A FAX NUMBER" - HARRIET, 86

"IF YOU'RE ASKING ME IF I NEED OR WANT MORE, THE ANSWER IS YES!" PETER TRAVERS, ROLLING STONE

"JULIEANN PROMISED TO TAKE ME GROCERY SHOPPING BUT SOMEONE CLAIMING TO BE HER BOYFRIEND PICKED ME UP AND WE ONLY WENT TO 7-ELEVEN SO HE COULD BUY CONDOMS. IT WAS OK I GUESS." - SHIRLEY, 90

"THANK YOU, JULIEANN, THANK YOU" - JULIEANN

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Nextdoor posts of the week

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LOOKING FOR AN ALTO SAX

I MEAN AN ALSO SAX

MUCH BETTER TO HAVE A TYPO IN THE ALTO THAN IN THE SAX, IMO

ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU FOLLOW IT UP WITH THE TURN OF PHRASE "IN THE CLOSET WAITING FOR AN EAGER YOUNG BOY"

I MEAN WTF IS THAT ALL ABOUT

THAT SAID, I DO HAVE A SPARE ALTO SAX (OBVIOUSLY) BUT IT'S MOUNTED ON THE WALL IN MY ALTO SAX ROOM, NOT THE CLOSET, AND ITS IDEAL PARTNER IS A MATURE CURVY WOMAN ... DO I STILL QUALIFY

ALSO:




BY THE WAY I HAD TO PAY LIKE $500 FOR MY DAUGHTER TO RENT A FLUTE FOR SIX MONTHS SO NO WAY YOU'RE GETTING AN ALTO SAX FOR FREE VIA NEXTDOOR




CAN'T BELIEVE IT

"AN ALTO NEEDING A HOME" SMH WHAT IS HAPPENING




I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WOMEN'S SHOES BUT: WHAT

"PEEP TOE ANKLE BOOTS SHOES, NO HOLDS" -- ERNEST HEMINGWAY, 2019





AN HONEST ALBEIT WEIRD (GOOGLE AND YELP STILL EXIST, "DO U LIKE IT?") POST ABOUT HAIRCUTS, BUT THAT'S NOT WHY WE'RE HERE

LET'S CHECK ON PAT IN THE COMMENTS




FARMINGDALE IS A TOWN




W…