So, Do You Like ... Stuff?

WILD HORSES COULDN'T STOP ME FROM TYPING "YES" "THIS PICTURE OF A COWBOY IN AN OVERCOAT WALKING BETWEEN A HORSE AND A SMALLER COWBOY HAS REMINDED ME THAT NOT ENOUGH PEOPLE ARE GOING TO CHURCH THESE DAYS" MAKES SENSE NOT TO BE A HORSE'S ASS BUT: *FEWER* BELIEVERS ALSO: COMMAS CANNOT BE ELLIPSES ALSO: WHAT ELIZABETH WRIGHT IS THE FIRST KNOWN "PERSON" TO HAVE HER FAITH IN HUMANITY RESTORED AFTER READING FACEBOOK COMMENTS ONE OF THE MOST AMAZING THINGS ABOUT OLDER FOLKS IS HOW THEY'RE ABLE TO ACCIDENTALLY ACHIEVE THE IMPOSSIBLE WHEN FUMBLING THEIR WAY THROUGH TECHNOLOGY, SUCH AS MANAGING TO INSERT A COMMA BELOW A "K" ON A FACEBOOK COMMENT YOU COULD GIVE ME A MONTH TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO THAT AND I WOULD FAIL OTHER THAN THAT THOUGH THIS COMMENT IS PERFECT AND USES PREPOSITIONS WELL AND IS NOT MISSING ANY WORDS AND IS NOT SEEMINGLY TARGETED AT NO ONE IN PARTICULAR AND HAS STRICTLY ADHERED TO THE INSTRUCTION...

ME : WHO WILL TAKE PICTURES OF ME AND MY HORSES THEM : HAVE YOU CHECKED THE SOCIAL MEDIA SITE NEXTDOOR ME : NO I THOUGHT THAT WAS FOR LIKE GARAGE SALES AND ADULT DIAPERS THEM : NO IT IS FOR LITERALLY ANYTHING YOU CAN POSSIBLY IMAGINE, IT CAN MAKE ALL OF YOUR WILDEST DREAMS COME TRUE ME : WOW BUT HERE'S THE THING-- NOT ONLY DO I WANT PICTURES OF ME AND MY HORSES, I WANT  OPTIONS THEM : LISTEN I'M NOT SAYING YOU'RE GOING TO FIND THE PERFECT HORSE PHOTOGRAPHER ON NEXTDOOR, ALL I'M SAYING IS GIVE IT A TRY ME : THIS IS THE GREATEST DAY OF MY LIFE, NOW IF I COULD ONLY FIND MY FRIEND CORNLIUS A HANYMAN CORNELIUS NEEDS A HANYMAN CORNELIUS WALKED THROUGH THE SCREEN DOOR BY ACCIDENT WHILE CHASING A FLY OUT OF THE HOUSE AND NOW HE NEEDS A NEW HANY FOR IT BUT HE'S NOT GOOD AT INSTALLING A HANY WHICH IS WHY CORNELIUS NEEDS A HANYMAN I HAVE A CRAZY IDEA DID YOU CONSIDER CALLING AMIGOS INSTEAD OF ASKING RANDOM STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET ALSO I...

I AM UNFAMILIAR WITH THIS SENTIMENT GOING TO HAVE TO THINK LONG AND HARD ABOUT THIS ONE BEFORE DECIDING WHETHER TO SHARE IN THE MEANTIME LET'S GATHER SOME OPINIONS OLD TROLLS IN COWBOYS HATS SHARING SARCASTIC MISOGYNISTIC COMMENTS ON WEIRD-ASS MEMES FOR THE SHEER THRILL OF IT ARE THE REAL HEROES EXCERPT FROM THE FORTHCOMING NOVEL TUESDAYS WITH PAWPAW "SO TRUE FOR A LOT OF RELATIONSHIP" RAVES RATEMYBOOK.COM IN ALL SERIOUSNESS THOUGH THIS COMMENT IS SO GOOD IT WARRANTS A SEQUEL AS IS USUALLY THE CASE THE SEQUEL WAS NOT AS GOOD AS THE ORIGINAL FIRST OF ALL, NOT LIKING THIS "GRANDPA" WHO REPLACED PAWPAW ALSO TOO LONG-- COULD HAVE DONE WITHOUT THE WHOLE BEDTIME AND WAKE-UP SCENES AND HONESTLY THE END WHERE GOD KILLS THAT MOLE FOR NO REASON WAS JUST CONFUSING BUT THE THEME HOLDS UP SO: THREE STARS OR YOUR COMMENT COULD GO LIKE THIS I DON'T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SENTENCE AND A MEME BUT THE WORLD SHOULD KNOW I'V...

HOW DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW I DRINK MY WATER, FAM BUT ARE YOU SAYING THAT SHOOTING IT UP MY BUTT WITH A GARDEN HOSE IS SO 2000 AND LATE YEAH WELL YOU DON'T NEED TO TELL *ME* ABOUT HOW POORLY WHALE STOCKS ARE PERFORMING THAT'S IT, I'M ONLY GIVING THESE DANG WHALES 9 MORE YEARS TO JUSTIFY MY INVESTMENT WORD OH NO NO. 3: TWO MILLION IS NOT EVEN THAT MANY NO. 5: THE GAMING SYSTEM'S PRODUCTION WAS INTRINSICALLY TIED TO WHALE STOCKS WILD HORSES COULDN'T DRAG ME FROM CLICKING ON THIS TIMELY AND INFORMATIVE NEWS ARTICLE HOW DOES ONE RETIRE FROM PUBLIC LIFE "... AND SO IN CONCLUSION, FOR REAL THIS TIME ... LEAVE ME ALONE" [ PRINCE PHILIP GOES TO USE THE PUBLIC RESTROOM AT A LONDON APPLEBEES, STOPPED BY MANAGER ] "I'M SORRY SIR THIS IS ONLY FOR ACTIVE PUBLIC PEOPLE; YOU'LL HAVE TO MAKE PEE-PEE OR POOPY IN YOUR CASTLE" IS YESTERDAY TOO SOON "I'VE GOT TWO TICKETS TO PARADISE ... BUT ...

ALL I NEED IS MY TRUSTY SNOW STEED AND MY NANNA I HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO OFFER THEM BUT MYSELF BECAUSE I AM 6 PLUS THEY NEED ME “I HATE YOU GET OFF ME” – HORSE “SIT HERE NEXT TO ME ON THIS PARK BENCH YOUNG BILLINGSLEY SO I CAN SHARE PROFOUND WISDOM I LEARNED IN WORLD WAR II—YOU WILL KNOW YOUR TRUE FRIEND AND FAMILY ARE WHEN YOUR NOT ABLE ANGMORE I AM SO DAMN RIGHT” "SIR ARE YOU OK SHOULD I CALL 911" SHOUT OUT TO BERT SENIOR AND DEBBIE ALDRED THERE ARE THE TRUSTY SNOW STEEEDS OF PAULA’S WEEK-ENDS WOW WHO KNEW OLD PEOPLE WERE SO WISE ONE TIME I MET AN OLD PERSON ON A PARK BENCH WHO WAS WEARING A PURPLE HEART AND HE TOLD ME “THE OLDER YOU GET THE MORE YOU REALIZE PEOPLE ARE THE WORST AND YOU GOTTA GET PAID, SON!” I WAS LIKE WHOA THEN HE GOT UP AND TOOK OFF HIS OLD PERSON MASK AND IT WAS REALLY KANYE WEST I’LL NEVER FORGET THAT DAY UH SOUNDS LIKE *SOMEONE* NEEDS A HORSEY RIDE HOW IS THAT ...