Classic card of the week

Scott Hastings, 1992-93 Fleer

Maybe the most amazing thing about this Scott Hastings card is the fact that this is the best photo Fleer could come up with involving Scott Hastings, one in which he is pretty much completely overshadowed by a guy who is not even Karl Malone, but almost. Says Fleer: “Here is half of Scott Hastings. Enjoy. We had to delay the release of this set for seven months because we were waiting for the Nuggets to put Scott Hastings into the game. When they finally did, we had one camera guy there, and he was working on his seventh Miller Lite at the time. So…this is what we got. And in case you were wondering, he missed the shot. That guy sucks.” Truth be told, a better (worse) photo of Hastings appears on the back of the card, where he is looking fabulous in his vintage Denver Nuggets uni (pre-retro), and most likely staring down court at the other four Nuggets who are doing their darndest to prevent Scott Hastings’ most recent mistake from turning into “points off of turnovers:”

Regardless of what we can’t tell about Scott Hastings from the photos, the mini-bio on the back seems to sum up his life in a nutshell: The gritty 6’10” banger was a member of the 1990 NBA Champion Detroit Pistons. Yep. Scott Hastings was a banger. And while it’s difficult to tell from his outfit whether Hastings sided with the Bloods or Crips – mostly blue, yes, but the itty bit of red throws off everything – it was later revealed that Hastings was the founding father of the Rainbow Coalition, a mostly non-violent organization that served to merge the many opposing political parties of the Finnish government between 1995-2003. Scott Hastings, as mentioned before, was also extremely gritty. When he was drafted by the New York Knicks in 1982, his scouting report read as follows: Pros: Very gritty, naturally hairless, gritty…Cons: Maybe too much grittiness, not very good at basketball. Of course, Hastings’ reputation as a “poor man’s Bill Lambier” arose from his inclusion on the champion Pistons of 1990. However, many people aren’t aware of the literal aspect of that moniker, as Hastings was acquired by the eccentric owner of the Denver Nuggets – Rusty Poorman – in 1991 because Poorman thought Hastings was Bill Lambier during an offseason workout in Beijing. Poorman would later admit, “Yeah…that was my bad. But ya’ gotta admit – the guy IS gritty. Wait, did I say “gritty?” I meant shitty.”

Scott Hastings fun facts!

Favorite Food: Coconuts

Favorite Musical Artist/Group: Kelly Rowland

Favorite Exercise: Military press

Three people, past or present, you’d like to have dinner with: Gandhi, Howard the Duck, and Edward Norton

Did you know?
Tim Hardaway hates Scott Hastings’ uniform…and also Scott Hastings.