One way to get rock solid insurance coverage

Last week a rock hit my windshield on the 101 as I was driving to work. That, or someone was trying to shoot me, because that is what my windshield ended up looking like afterwards. Contrary to my claim last week that warm weather is already forcing me to use the A/C in the morning, a pleasant dawn allowed me to drive with the window open. And let me just say, had that rock made its way through the open window and onto the side of my head, I would not be here today. Because I would be dead. (From the rock hitting my head. I trust I am being clear.)

It was nothing new that a rock hit my windshield because rocks hit my windshield all the time here. What is that? During my decade of driving back east, I cannot recall a rock ever hitting my windshield, and if one did, it definitely never caused any damage. But here in the Valley, every time I get on the freeway it feels like my car is getting pelted in a hailstorm of flying freeway debris. My only defense is the hope that none leave a mark. Is there a scientific explanation for this? The fact that people drive like lunatics here has to be at least partially responsible. The rock that hit my windshield probably came from a massive pickup truck carrying rocks that was supposed to be going 65 but was instead doing 90 so it could get to the gun show on time. I am not bitter.

I knew from the sound of it hitting my windshield that this rock wasn’t like the others. This was a keeper. The crack mark was instant, and witnessing this happen really added some good vibes to my Monday morning commute to work. Still, I thought, no biggie. I’ll just call the insurance company.

You see, I am a smart person. Probably as a result of getting pelted with highways rocks during my very first Valley drive, I was sure to get comprehensive coverage on our auto insurance plan upon moving here. The insurance rep affirmed this … and also that I had a $500 deductible, meaning that I might as well not have insurance because I will have to pay for this out of pocket. I am an idiot.

BUT WAIT! Insurance will waive the deductible if the mark is a chip no bigger than a dollar bill. (I don’t know why she used “dollar bill” as a point of reference. How is a dollar bill in any way a shape that corresponds to the mark a rock leaves on your windshield? Yes, ma’am, the mark is a perfect rectangle with what appears to be George Washington’s likeness. It’s possible I misheard—maybe she said silver dollar—but I don’t think so.) So I was like, yeah, it’s not that bi—and I stopped myself because when I went to double-check, the crack had spread all the way across to the middle of the windshield.

So I had to have my entire windshield replaced and pay almost $300, which was not inconvenient at all. I immediately called the insurance company to upgrade my comprehensive coverage to a $0 deductible, and I recommend you do the same, which you probably have already done, because you are not stupid. The end.

Dramatization

Comments

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