"Ice, Ice Baby" explained

VERSE 1

All right stop, collaborate and listen


Everybody stop what you’re doing. Then find a partner and work on a project together that has yet to be determined. Then listen to me.

Ice is back

This is my first single.

With a brand new invention

This invention is called “horrible rap.” Take that, Benjamin Franklin. To the rest of you: you’re welcome.

Something grabs a hold of me tightly

Songs such as this one are not entirely my doing, but partly the result of an otherwordly force that urges me to rap about stuff.

Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly

The manner in which I rap “flows” similar to the flow of a harpoon, which is, according to Wikipedia, “a long spear like instrument used in fishing to catch fish or other large marine mammals such as whales.” I flow like this everyday. And also every night, which is different from the day. I do not sleep.

Will it ever stop? Yo, I don’t know

Sometimes I will ask myself a question and then immediately and condescendingly dismiss that question as stupid. Regardless, I have no idea if or when my flow will ever cease.

Turn off the lights and I’ll glow

I am so good at rapping that I literally glow in the dark.

To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal


On the microphone, I rap just as well as a person who damages property. This is something that I do in the most extreme manner possible.

Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle

To “wax” someone, in this context, would mean to out-rap them, on a stage, that I have lit up with my immense stage presence. A “chump” is a person who is stupid and cannot rap. I will frequently wax a chump in the same fashion that one would wax a candle, which is something that is made of wax, but that can also be waxed, according to me.

Dance, go rush to the speaker that booms

This is self-explanatory.

I’m killing your brain like a poisonous mushroom

My music is so enjoyable to listen to that it will kill your brain. Your brain will die from listening to my music. This process is similar to the experience of consuming the ever-so-dangerous and brain-killing poisonous mushroom, which is found exclusively in remote areas of South Dakota. Brain-killing poisonous mushrooms are the number two cause of brain death in the United States, behind only: my music.

Deadly when I play a dope melody

Ya’ know what? If you value your life, you might want to stop listening like, right now.

Anything less than the best is a felony

I always give my best. Should I ever fail to give my best, I will arrest myself on felony charges of “not giving my best,” which has a minimum mandatory sentence of six months probation.

Love it or leave it, you better gain weight

I don’t really care if you love my music, or if you’re indifferent to it. The point is: you need to eat more.

You better hit bull’s eye, the kid don’t play

This is a literary device called symbolism. I am “the kid.” Also, I do not play, meaning that I do not lollygag when it comes to rapping –- I remain focused and vigilant at all times and work hard to succeed. In order to defeat me, you must “hit the bull’s eye,” meaning that you must, like…also do your best, or something. Should you succeed in doing your best, it is implied here that, yes –- you could beat me. Take that.

If there was a problem, yo I’ll solve it

Thankfully, there are no problems currently in the world, besides, of course, brain-killing poisonous mushrooms, which are obviously out of my control. But if there were a problem, hypothetically, I could and would solve it. If anyone should hear about a problem, just call me. My name is Vanilla Ice.

Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it


Enjoy the chorus. This song won multiple awards.

Comments

Don said…
If I didn't know you were sitting at your desk bobbing your head to this I'd say you were my hero.
mkenny59 said…
Damn. But hey -- you can't argue with the timeliness of this, am I right?

Would it be worse that I was nodding my head to this at my desk, or that I had this song in my head already because it was part of a kid's dance recital that I attended over the weekend? That is a hypothetical question.
Jason said…
I spit beer out my nose reading this!
Anthony said…
that was off the heezy
Siobhan said…
This is brilliant.
Henry Ehlers said…
"Ice Ice Baby"

Yo, VIP, let's kick it!

Ice Ice Baby, Ice Ice Baby

All right stop, Collaborate and listen
Ice is back with my brand new invention
Something grabs a hold of me tightly
Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly
Will it ever stop? Yo, I don't know
Turn off the lights and I'll glow
To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal
Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle.

Dance, go rush the speaker that booms
I'm killing your brain like a poisonous mushroom
Deadly, when I play a dope melody
Anything less than the best is a felony
Love it or leave it, you better gain way
You better hit bull's eye, the kid don't play

If there was a problem, yo, I'll solve it
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it

Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla
Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla

Now that the party is jumping
With the bass kicked in, and the Vegas are pumpin'
Quick to the point, to the point, no faking
Cooking MCs like a pound of bacon
Burning them they ain't quick and nimble
I go crazy when I hear a cymbal
And a hi hat with a souped up tempo
I'm on a roll and it's time to go solo
Rollin' in my 5.0
With my ragtop down so my hair can blow
The girlies on standby, waving just to say, "Hi!"
Did you stop? No, I just drove by
Kept on pursuing to the next stop
I busted a left and I'm heading to the next block
That block was dead Yo
So I continued to A1A Beachfront Ave.

Girls were hot wearing less than bikinis
Rockman lovers driving Lamborghinis
Jealous 'cause I'm out getting mine
Shay with a gauge and Vanilla with a nine
Ready for the chumps on the wall
The chumps acting ill because they're so full of "Eight Ball"
Gunshots ranged out like a bell
I grabbed my nine, all I heard was shells
Falling on the concrete real fast
Jumped in my car, slammed on the gas
Bumper to bumper, the avenue's packed
I'm trying to get away before the jackers jack
Police on the scene, you know what I mean
They passed me up, confronted all the dope fiends

If there was a problem, yo, I'll solve it
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it

Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla
Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla

Take heed, 'cause I'm a lyrical poet
Miami's on the scene just in case you didn't know it
My town, that created all the bass sound
Enough to shake and kick holes in the ground
'Cause my style's like a chemical spill
Feasible rhymes that you can vision and feel
Conducted and formed, this is a hell of a concept
We make it hype and you want to step with this
Shay plays on the fade, slice like a ninja
Cut like a razor blade so fast, other DJs say, "Damn."
If my rhyme was a drug, I'd sell it by the gram
Keep my composure when it's time to get loose
Magnetized by the mic while I kick my juice

If there was a problem, Yo, I'll solve it!
Check out the hook while D-Shay revolves it.

Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla
Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla

Yo, man, let's get out of here! Word to your mother!

Ice Ice Baby Too cold, Ice Ice Baby Too cold Too cold
Ice Ice Baby Too cold Too cold, Ice Ice Baby Too cold Too cold
Henry Ehlers said…
"Ice Ice Baby"

Yo, VIP, let's kick it!

Ice Ice Baby, Ice Ice Baby

All right stop, Collaborate and listen
Ice is back with my brand new invention
Something grabs a hold of me tightly
Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly
Will it ever stop? Yo, I don't know
Turn off the lights and I'll glow
To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal
Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle.

Dance, go rush the speaker that booms
I'm killing your brain like a poisonous mushroom
Deadly, when I play a dope melody
Anything less than the best is a felony
Love it or leave it, you better gain way
You better hit bull's eye, the kid don't play

If there was a problem, yo, I'll solve it
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it

Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla
Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla

Now that the party is jumping
With the bass kicked in, and the Vegas are pumpin'
Quick to the point, to the point, no faking
Cooking MCs like a pound of bacon
Burning them they ain't quick and nimble
I go crazy when I hear a cymbal
And a hi hat with a souped up tempo
I'm on a roll and it's time to go solo
Rollin' in my 5.0
With my ragtop down so my hair can blow
The girlies on standby, waving just to say, "Hi!"
Did you stop? No, I just drove by
Kept on pursuing to the next stop
I busted a left and I'm heading to the next block
That block was dead Yo
So I continued to A1A Beachfront Ave.

Girls were hot wearing less than bikinis
Rockman lovers driving Lamborghinis
Jealous 'cause I'm out getting mine
Shay with a gauge and Vanilla with a nine
Ready for the chumps on the wall
The chumps acting ill because they're so full of "Eight Ball"
Gunshots ranged out like a bell
I grabbed my nine, all I heard was shells
Falling on the concrete real fast
Jumped in my car, slammed on the gas
Bumper to bumper, the avenue's packed
I'm trying to get away before the jackers jack
Police on the scene, you know what I mean
They passed me up, confronted all the dope fiends

If there was a problem, yo, I'll solve it
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it

Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla
Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla

Take heed, 'cause I'm a lyrical poet
Miami's on the scene just in case you didn't know it
My town, that created all the bass sound
Enough to shake and kick holes in the ground
'Cause my style's like a chemical spill
Feasible rhymes that you can vision and feel
Conducted and formed, this is a hell of a concept
We make it hype and you want to step with this
Shay plays on the fade, slice like a ninja
Cut like a razor blade so fast, other DJs say, "Damn."
If my rhyme was a drug, I'd sell it by the gram
Keep my composure when it's time to get loose
Magnetized by the mic while I kick my juice

If there was a problem, Yo, I'll solve it!
Check out the hook while D-Shay revolves it.

Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla
Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla

Yo, man, let's get out of here! Word to your mother!

Ice Ice Baby Too cold, Ice Ice Baby Too cold Too cold
Ice Ice Baby Too cold Too cold, Ice Ice Baby Too cold Too cold