Monday, May 15, 2006

Classic card of the week


1986 Topps Rance Mulliniks

Like many young Americans of the 1980’s, I was left utterly confused the first time I laid eyes upon a Rance Mulliniks baseball card. “That’s a misprint, right? His name is really Lance Mulligan, right?” Here is the answer to those questions: wrong. Truth be told, the parents of Rance Mulliniks – the Mulligans – actually had plans to name their first boy “Lance,” but he was born in Asia (racism), and when the birth certificate was filled out, many things were lost in translation (including his middle name, “Rarry” ((terrible))). The Mulligans had intentions to legally change their son’s name back to normal, until Rance hit three triples in a tee-ball little league game. It was too late, because a star was born. Unfortunately, that star’s name was Rance Mulliniks. On the positive side, Rance Mulliniks, like Peter Pan, never ages, and he eventually DID change his name to Jeff Kent. As far as that thing on his neck, I don’t know if it’s a birthmark, or some undetermined residue that happened to creep into my shoebox of old baseball cards. I’m thinking the latter because, believe it or not, my collection of Rance Mulliniks never seemed to require protective plastic sleeves.

Did you know?
Larry Bird once said of Rance Mulliniks, “He is like God in baseball cleats.”

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

That is hysterical!!!

Why are baseball cards always kept in shoe boxes?