Tuesday, April 04, 2017

Rubin Sandwich


Here are some observations from another outstanding social media community group posting that undermines the intended purpose of social media community groups:
  • "Rubin"
  • "Rubin Sandwich." Neither needs to be capitalized. The is the least of my issues with this, but not not an issue.
  • The subject of this post did not disappoint. It was definitely about a reuben sandwich (or, more specifically, a Rubin Sandwich). When I first saw it pop up I thought, This can't actually be about a reuben sandwich. But it was.
  • Ask a social media community group where to get a reuben sandwich > search Yelp or sites that are more specifically geared to retrieve information about reuben, and other, sandwiches
  • Question for Shirley: Does it have to be a good reuben sandwich? Because if not, I could make you a reuben sandwich. I mean, I won't, but I could.
  • Arby's left? In this scenario Arby's is like some mom and pop sandwich shop (eg. Mom & Pop's Sandwich Shoppe) which met an untimely demise thanks to gentrification and millennials' lack of appreciation for reuben sandwiches. What the hell is that all about? It's Arby's! Even if one Arby's actually did leave under the cover of night, I'm sure there's another one like 1.7 miles away. Because, again, it's Arby's. I've never noticed, but I probably pass 14 Arby's on my way to work. They have the meats!
  • Could you imagine having a husband who is pestering you about finding him a reuben sandwich via social media neighborhood groups? This is the epitome of laziness. Even a 1950s-era misogynistic, borderline abusive husband would look at this situation and be like, "Find your own dang reuben ya' big slob."
  • Husband: Any news on the reuben sandwi- Shirley: DAMMIT FRANK I ASKED OK? IT'S ALL I CAN DO, IF SOMEONE RESPONDS I'LL LET YOU KNOW, IN THE MEANTIME THE WHOPPER DELUXE WILL HAVE TO DO, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU.
  • The thing is-- and this is crazy, I know, but 100 percent true-- in the past two weeks I discovered that a local restaurant serves an outstanding grouper reuben sandwich. For someone like me, who doesn't eat meat but who used to love a good reuben, this has been a God-send, and I've had it twice since. This, of course, would make me uniquely qualified to respond to Shirley's question. But I did not, because this whole thing is nuts and I am not being dragged into a conversation about reuben sandwiches with a stranger. Can you even imagine?
  • Now, blogging about it? Completely normal.

3 comments:

troy said...

Naw, dude, I think you misunderstood -- she was asking about Rubin Sandwich:

http://straightfromthea.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Ruben-Studdard-Divorce-Final-1.jpg

I did not know that Arby's has reubens, partly because I don't like reuben sandwiches and partly because I don't eat at Arby's, which was true even before they ... left town? Heywaitaminute! But what I did know is that you can get a reuben at really literally any diner in the world, although by 'know' I mean 'am pretty sure.'

PlanetJane said...

I was on NextDoor for about a minute. The combination of banality, poor spelling, and sanctimoniousness (my neighborhood is very white-collar liberal) made me run screaming. Had I known about the Rubin Issue, I'd have left even sooner.

KO Rob said...

The only explanation I can think of involves, on Shirley's part A) a complete ignorance of the reuben as a sandwich made anywhere outside of Arby's, and the infinitely less likely B) that "the Arbys" are a nomadic sandwich making tribe that blew out of their one stoplight town without notice, and not the chain that we're assuming.