Wednesday, May 06, 2015

Spam email of the week

Subject: Fw:Necklace wholesale 2015 latest design crystal necklace jewelry

This seems relevant to our newspaper. Let me check it out.

Dear,

Dear ... somebody whatever doesn't matter just buy the necklaces dammit,

Good day.
(Quality is our culture)


Following a weak salutation with what appears to be a motto, inexplicably in parenthesis, indicates that quality is certainly not your culture when it comes to emails. But who I am kidding - I need some m______ f______ necklaces. What's up?

This is Vickie from Aicharme Jewelry Co., Ltd, professional supplier from Austrian Crystal Jewelry for Europe and U.S. market for more than 8 years.

Hi, Vickie! We have been with our respective employers for almost the same amount of time. TWINSIES.

We own 2 factories and thousands of Austrian Crystal Jewelry designs, whatever you are looking for, you can find it in our factory.

I need mailing labels for our newspapers. Also: mad necklaces.

"We believe our products will give you an edge over your competitors."

This is in quotes (and red font, fwiw) as if it's a first-person testimonial that was provided by someone other than Vickie. Also, who are my necklace competitors? 2 Chainz?

Please check attached new designs. Hope you like any of them and hope we can have chance to serve you in the near future.

I am looking at these words but don't see any necklaces. Where does the good business start?

(THE GOOD BUSINESS START HERE)

Thank you.



This is OK but my wife thinks heart jewelry is mad cheesey, son (her words). No offense, Vickie.



That is a beautiful necklace. I will take ... (counts amount of wives I have on my fingers) ... one. Also, some mailing labels.

1 comment:

troy said...

Watch out; last time I saw a necklace like that, it was around Sansa Stark's neck and then somebody died.