Spam email of the week
Subject: QUAYLE - 2016 BUMPER STICKERS NOW AVAILABLE
Cool! What?
Dear Mr. FVP Quayle,
Please run for President in 2016.
I uh … I’m not sure I’m supposed to have recei-
I can sense the media people now realize the days of cracking
ignorant jokes at your and quite frankly everyone's expense are long gone.
Pretty sure those jokes were only at Dan Quayle’s expense. Also
they are long gone because they happened 22 years ago. The days of
taking pot shots at Caligula’s barbarism are long gone. Okay, it’s safe to come out
now, Caligula!
Two days ago I sent these proposed bumper stickers by email to
about 300 newspaper publishers, editors and reporters in Indiana just to see what the response would
be. I only received one negative reply from someone who was an obvious Obama
supporter.
I’m not sure ignoring ridonk bumper sticker-related emails
counts as an endorsement. Nevertheless, it’s official – Dan Quayle has taken Indiana! Only 49 more to
go!
Thank you for being the kind of person that you are.
Are you talking to me or Dan Quayle? (Amazingly, that is not the
first time I have asked that. Long story.)
QUAYLE - 2016
SINCERE, HONEST, SMART, EXPERIENCED,
HUMBLE
HELLO MY FRIENDS, WE MEET AGAIN
He’s the fifth one because he was constantly accused of not
being the third one. Also I am not your friend.
QUAYLE - 2016
HAD YOU RATHER
MISSPELLED POTATO
THAN LEARNED TO SPELL OBAMA?
Makes no sense.
QUAYLE - 2016
OF
COURSE "HE'S NO JFK"
HE'S MR. FAMILY VALUES
Dan Quayle: not the president who died 50 years ago. Also
not an adulterer? I don’t know.
CANDICE BERGEN
PUBLICLY ADMITTED
"QUAYLE
WAS RIGHT"
wtf. I seriously want to put this bumper sticker on my car.
THE WASHINGTON
POST...
"QUAYLE
WAS RIGHT"
RIGHT THEN - RIGHT NOW- THE RIGHT CHOICE
Right about what? The capital of Arkansas? Global warming? The winner of the The Voice Season 2? It’s almost like this bumper sticker is
taking something out of context.
QUAYLE - 2016
DAN'S THE MAN WITH
THE PLAN WHO CAN
WIN FOR AMERICA!
This one rhymes.
QUAYLE - 2016
THE BEST CANDIDATE
WE'VE SEEN IN 25 YEARS
SO THE JOKE'S ON WHO.....LENO?
Seriously what the hell is going on? Is this the Dan Quayle
Worldwide Tour of Bumper Sticker Revenge For Perceived Slights? Will no one be
spared?
Oliver North
Amelia Earhart
Sinbad
Mr. Belvedere
QUAYLE - 2016
LET'S ALL THANK GOD FOR GIVING US
MR. FAMILY VALUES
Yes, let’s.
GOT QUAYLE ?
2016
YOU GOT THE RIGHT ONE BABY
Got Milk reference circa 1993 + Pepsi commercial reference
circa 1991 + bumper sticker campaign = relevant presidential candidate circa 2016
U.S.A.! U.S.A.! U.S.A.!
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