Chopsticks promo of the week



Credit to my brother-in-law, who took the time to examine his chopsticks long enough to discover this very helpful message. Let's break it down.

Welcome to Chinese Restaurant.


  • I am at home.
  • We are eating Thai food.
  • Based on capitalization, I enjoy the notion that there might be a Chinese restaurant somewhere out there called Chinese Restaurant from which these chopsticks are manufactured.
  • Thank you.


Please try your Nice Chinese Food with Chopsticks


  • Obviously I was leaning that way, but now I am sold.
  • Again, eating Thai.
  • Coercive Utensils would be a good name for a band. (h/t Dave Barry)
  • This capitalization is as Nice as the Chinese food I am not currently eating.
  • OK.


the traditional and typical of Chinese glorious history.


  • In retrospect, should have had a comma after "Cchopsticks."
  • what
  • Am I seriously supposed to be contemplating Chinese history as I am eating this Thai food? Ugh, fine, chopsticks-- you're the boss.
  • This seems hella subjective for what should honestly be an unbiased chopsticks anecdote.
  • Although admittedly, the only reason I ever use chopsticks is to not be perceived as so American, so these chopsticks have a point.
  • Anyway, in conclusion, not a strong sentence, but at least it's finished.


and culture


  • It wasn't finished.
  • But nice touch having a period in the middle of the sentence as opposed to the end, which is traditional and typical of glorious English history. 
  • Feels like these chopsticks don't adhere to AP Style.


Anyway, thanks for stopping by for what has been the first-- and I imagine last, but who knows!-- installment of "Chopsticks promo of the week." Have a Nice and glorious Day.

Comments