Classic card of the week

Todd Worrell, 1990 Score

Front of the card? Eh.

Back of the card? Chock full of goodies. And elongated ‘staches!

Todd was a tremendous loss to the Cardinals in ’90,

Positive start here. First thing we learn about Todd Worrell: he’s either dead, or was not around for some reason, for the Cardinals, in the year of 1990. I am excited! You? No? Let us continue:

even though Lee Smith was a solid replacement as the team’s stopper.

The all-time Major League leader in saves (until Trevor Hoffman passed him in 2006) = solid replacement. Lee Smith led the NL in 1991 with 47 saves and finished second in the Cy Young vote. By the time Worrell had returned, he had lost his job to Smith. I wonder what a “very good replacement” would have been like.

Anyway, Todd Worrell got injured. But before that, he was really good, as the following tidbit describes in naughty detail:

A menacing figure on the mound, Todd threw a sizzling 95-mph fastball as hard as could, as long as he could. By blowing away batters, he racked up over 30 saves for three straight seasons

That whole statement deserves one, big “That’s what she said.” (And yes, I also include the “rack” part of “racked.” Nothing gets past me.) I particularly enjoy the mentioning of how Todd Worrell threw the ball as hard as he could, as if that is some defining characteristic of a power pitcher. But geez, “as long as he could?” What does that even mean? It’s only 60 feet, six inches from the mound to home plate. If Todd Worrell were simply rearing back and launching it into the stands every time, that like, wouldn’t be good. Or if they’re trying to say “as long as he could” in that, Todd Worrell would stay on the mound for as long as he needed to so that he could continue throwing the ball as hard as he could, then well…that is also not a positive attribute for a closer.

This may also serve to explain why Todd Worrell had like 17 surgeries on his elbow in a two-year span. Luckily, he was able to eventually recover and pitch well for the Dodgers. Opposing batters always maintained that it was really hard to get good wood on Todd Worrell’s sizzling balls.

Did you know?
I am 13-years old.


SpastikMooss said…
hahahahaha. Beautiful. I don't think I will ever get over the beginning of the card - worst intro by a card back ever.