Classic card of the week

Louis Lipps, 1992 Collector’s Edge

Louis Lipps did not exude the confidence of a man who caught passes for a living. Take this card for example. This looks like the “before” snapshot of an extremely bad dropped pass. There is too much concentration going into this feat. Louis Lipps is attempting to catch this pass as if his life depended on it, and that is just too much pressure to place on oneself as it pertains to the pure simplicity of catching a football. If this were Randy Moss, he would casually be reaching down to catch this pass with his right pinky finger (or, ya' know, his ELBOW!) while simultaneously staring at a cheerleader and contemplating what he was going to do for his touchdown dance. Meanwhile, Louis Lipps doesn’t even have his chinstrap fastened, there’s not a defender anywhere in the picture, and it looks like he’s one second away from pooping his pants. Even his positioning doesn’t make sense! His back is to the freakin’ endzone, and he looks like he’s fielding a line-drive punt instead trying to catch a pass. (Then again, that pass was most likely thrown by Neil O’Donnell, who didn’t exactly catch Louis in stride with this one.) Whether or not he caught this pass is mostly irrelevant, considering that Louis Lipps broke down NFL barriers by becoming the first player in league history to rock the receding hairline flattop. This eventually paved the way for Jerry Rice’s receding hairline cornrows, which was the fashion equivalent of an extremely bad dropped pass.

Did you know?*

Yes, I am aware that Louis Lipps also returned punts – quite well, actually – but his hands would be more underneath the ball if that were the case. I am also aware that this picture could be from warmups and not during an actual game. However, both of these scenarios ruin my original intent, which was to make fun of Louis Lipps. In other news, I am running out of football cards.

*longest “Did you know?” ever.