Nextdoor posts of the week

DJ ELECTRA IS BACK ON LAND FOLKS

"A PROFESSIONAL DJ *AND* MOTIVATOR" WHERE DOES SHE FIND THE TIME

PROSPECTIVE EMPLOYER: IT SAYS HERE YOU'RE A PROFESSIONAL DJ *AND* MOTIVATOR, CARE TO ELABORATE?

DJ ELECTRA: I KNOW IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY OF INTERVIEWS AND YOU'D RATHER BE HOME, BUT WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO NOW IS RAISE YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR, AND WAVE 'EM LIKE YOU JUST DON'T CARE

PROSPECTIVE EMPLOYER: (HANDS UP) WOW YOU'RE GOOD

DJ ELECTRA LIVES IN WALL, HOPE THIS IS HELPFUL AS THERE IS NO OTHER CONTACT INFORMATION

PLEASE LOOK UP DJ ELECTRA IN THE YELLOW PAGES UNDER "SERVICE > REASONABLE DJS" OR "MOTIVATORS"

SHE IS LISTED UNDER "DJ ELECTRA!!!" THREE EXCLAMATION POINTS

ANYTHING FEWER THAN THREE EXCLAMATION POINTS IS THE WRONG DJ ELECTRA; ANYTHING MORE IS ABSURD

GOOD LUCK

LOOKS LIKE SUSAN REMEMBERED TO ADD DJ ELECTRA'S CONTACT INFO BUT I ENJOY THIS POST MUCH MORE ON ITS OWN AND OUT OF CONTEXT

"I WAS SCROLLING THROUGH NEXTDOOR SEARCHING FOR ADULT DIAPERS AND I THOUGHT YA' KNOW WHAT, I'M GONNA CALL DJ ELECTRA ... WE TALKED FOR HOURS"

ALSO SUSAN IS DEFINITELY *NOT* DJ ELECTRA

DON'T FOR ONE SECOND THINK THAT SUSAN IS DJ ELECTRA

SUSAN IS ONLY A DJ ELECTRA ENTHUSIAST

I MEAN YEAH, SUSAN CAN SPIN, AND CAN DEFINITELY GET THE PARTY STARTED ANYTIME, ANYPLACE, AND HAD A MODEST FOLLOWING AS "DJ SUSAN" FOR CARNIVAL CRUISES BEFORE AN HONEST "MACARENA" MISHAP CAUSED A PARTY-GOER TO FALL OVERBOARD AND DERAILED HER CAREER, BUT SHE IS ONLY HELPING OUT A FRIEND

SORRY, NAH

OH WAIT