So, Do You Like ... Stuff?

THIS IS AS FUNNY AS IT IS TIMELY THANK YOU DAVE’S WORDS OF WISDOM FOR THE LOLZ “PEOPLE KEEP ASKING IF I’VE SEEN PRECIOUS WOW I DIDN’T KNOW THEY MADE A MOVIE ABOUT MY BASEBALL CARD COLLECTION” YOU CAN USE THAT IF YOU WANT DAVE ANYWAY WHO ELSE IS ENJOYING THIS MEME I RESPECT YOUR OPINION APPROPRIATE REACTION YOU SHOULD READ ALLIE BROSH I BET YOU WILL ENJOY IT AND GET IT BECAUSE OF YOUR GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, A NATURAL GREY REALLY SHOWS D JEWELS I HEARD THEY ALSO SHOWED D JEWELS IN THE MOVIE MAYBE YOU’RE USING THE WRONG DIR THANK YOU RUSSELL YOUR INPUT HAS BEEN INVALUABLE YOU DIDN’T KNOW WHY YOU WERE DYEING YOUR HAIR UNTIL YOU SAW THIS MEME THEY SHOULD PUT YOU ON THE NEWS A+ COMMENT “I WILL NOT CUSS EVEN IN ACRONYM FORM AND EVEN WHEN FACED WITH UNDENIABLE HILARITY THAT THREATENS TO OBLITERATE WHAT RESTRAINT I HAVE LEFT” – CLEAH WALKINSHAW ...

Our girls have a tendency to pass notes to each other during times of conflict—see here: This confiscated sister-to-sister note is all the dashboard motivation I need to keep going today. pic.twitter.com/5cSGrw0vtV — Mike Kenny (@mikekennystuff) January 26, 2016 —and distress. We came to discover that, when they are sent to their rooms for any of the wide range of infractions they commit daily, they’ve been secretly escaping, if only to slide notes under each other’s doors. My first assumption was that these notes were a means to continue the pointlessly bizarre argument that earned them room time in the first place, but I was mistaken. They are actually notes of encouragement (!). It’s as if they are bound to the walls of a maximum security prison, and whatever energies they spent on crime must now be expended more selflessly, to ensure that all hope is not lost. This was certainly the nature of the best note we found (the name cross-outs are mine): ...

THEY RECYCLED THIS MEME BUT THIS TIME IT DOESN’T HAVE AN EGREGIOUS ERROR [SAD FACE] BUT IT DOES HAVE PAPA SMURF [HAPPY FACE] #SOCIALISSUES AND YET YOU ARE STILL SMARTER THAN PEOPLE WITH PETS THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO MMMM (H/T C&C MUSIC FACTORY) "CURRENTLY I DERIVE FULFILLMENT FROM COMMENTING ON PAPA SMURF MEMES ON THE INTERNET ... IT DOESN'T PAY AS WELL BUT AT LEAST I'VE MAINTAINED MY DIGNITY" - JULIE N LIAM TAPIA ARE THESE “HIGHER CLASS” OF PEOPLE ASKING YOU TO REPEAT YOURSELF SLOWLY BECAUSE YOU ARE FORGETTING TO INJECT IMPORTANT WORDS INTO CONVERSATION “THEY BUILT THIS COUNTRY … THEY BUILT THIS COUNTRY FROM THE SCHOOOOOOL OF LIFE” TO THE TUNE OF “WE BUILT THIS CITY” STAT BTW DOES THE SCHOOL OF LIFE OFFER A GRAMMAR 101 PROGRAM OR NAH GET A LOAD OF THIS GUY MORE LIKE ASS -IMILATED AMIRITE WE’RE GETTIN’ DEEP INTO CONSPIRACY THEORY TERRITORY ON THIS PAPA SMURF MEME FOLKS ...

MY ONLY REGRET IS NOT BEING ABLE TO LIKE THIS HARDER #BAREFEETMEMES THERE GOES VICKI J TALLEY “TENDERFOOT” HENSON HER DAD WAS A TOUGH DISCIPLINARIAN BUT HER ADULT-ONSET SOFT FEET MADE IT ALL WORTH IT THROWBACK THURSDAY TO THE TIME CAROL MCCUE NELSON SLEPT AT ANN JORGENSEN HEBERER’S HOUSE AND THEY WASHED THEIR FEET HOW DOES NOSTALGIA GET A BAD RAP “COVER ME, I’M ABOUT TO ANNOUNCE MY WIDE-FOOT DISEASE AND ALSO DISPARAGE CHINA IN THIS BARE FEET MEME COMMENTS THREAD” – SHEILA TREI GOMEZ : (CLIMBING MOUNTAINS BARE FOOTED) TREI GOMEZ'S WIFE : (RUSHES OUT OF FRONT DOOR OF MOUNTAIN SHACK) TREI! TREI! TREI GOMEZ : WHAT WOMAN? CAN'T YOU SEE I'M CLIMBING MOUNTAINS BARE FOOTED I HATE SHOES TREI GOMEZ'S : THEY JUST POSTED A MEME TO FACEBOOK, YOU GOTTA SEE THIS TREI GOMEZ : THIS BETTER BE GOOD ... GOOD STUFF YOUR DAD TOLD YOU ABRAHAM LINCOLN DIED OF FOOT BLISTERS OTHER THAN THAT HOW WAS THE PLAY ...

Although she plays a starring supporting role in this book about a fascinating man , I’m not sure my mother-in-law gets enough credit. Something happened the other day that perfectly encapsulates the type of person she is. All of a sudden, the hinges on the door that leads to our garage started squeaking. Like, something fierce —every time I went to put 8 empty beer bottles something in recycling it sounded like a horror movie. It was absurd. I knew I needed some WD40 but I just hadn’t gotten around to getting it. MEANWHILE—bear with me here—my in-laws bought our daughters a dollhouse. This was very exciting as it was the girls’ … (counting on fingers) … sixteenth dollhouse, the magic number that leads to a fail proof happy childhood. For reasons beyond me but that probably relate to their behavior at the time, we weren’t giving the girls the dollhouse right away. Instead, it would sit in our garage discreetly covered by a black garbage bag until SOMEONE HAD THE DECENCY TO P...

HAPPY THURSDAY DON’T FORGET TO READ AND JUST BE HAPPY HOPEFULLY THIS MEME SOLVED YOUR DEPRESSION SHOULD I CALL OUT OF WORK TO DO THESE THINGS "HI BOSS? YEAH HOW MANY DREAM/PLAY/LOVE/READ DAYS DO I HAVE LEFT? WHAT? YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. I MEAN ... I HAVE DIARRHEA, SEE YOU FRIDAY" OK I'M GOOD TO GO - BRING ON THE READING CROSS PROMOTION I WAS PLANNING TO “LIVE EVERY MOMENT” AT CULVER’S FOR DINNER ANYWAY SO THIS WILL WORK OUT PERFECTLY “HOW CAN I LET THE WORLD KNOW I’M MOVING IN A WAY THAT DOESN’T COME ACROSS LIKE A DESPERATE ATTEMPT TO DO JUST THAT? (SEES “HAPPY THURSDAY” MEME) OH THIS IS PERFECT” I DIDN’T SEE “WISH JUDY A GREAT DAY” ON THIS LIST BUT OK JUST CHECKED “LAUGH” OFF MY LIST THANKS JACK FOR THIS HILARIOUS PARODY OF AN INTERNET COMMENT THAT DOESN’T SEEM CONSISTENT WITH THE THEME, SAMMY SPADE "SAMMY SPADE: OUT FOR REVENGE" I WOULD SEE THAT MOVIE I...

MY ALL-TIME FAVORITE NBA SCORE IS 114-97, RAPTORS WELL IT’S AT LEAST IN MY TOP 14 SO TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTION, YOU BET YOUR ASS I HOVE SEEN NUMBER 7 I WILL CLICK ON DUDESHARE ANYWAY THO BECAUSE THEY ALWAYS BRING THE REALNESS ------ AFTER BROWSING DUDESHARE I WILL HEAD OVER TO UDDERLYPETTABLE TO SEE WHAT I CANNOT DO WHEN I RUN INTO A PEACOCK-CHICKEN HYBRID SEEMS HELPFUL THIS IS ME WITH A GROUP OF FRIENDS RUNNING INTO A PEACOCK-CHICKEN ON A NATURE WALK: “STAY CALM EVERYONE I KNOW WHAT TO DO I SAW THIS ON UDDERLYPETTABLE” (DIES) ------ “HI MY NAME IS GRAHAM YOU CAN SEE MY INSIDES FROM THIS WEIRD SHIRT-LIKE THING I CALL MY SKIN BECAUSE I AM PREDISPOSED TO SURVIVING CAR CRASHES IN FACT I AM THE ONLY MAN WHO CAN SURVIVE A CAR CRASH” “MY COUSIN FRANK SURVIVED A CAR CRASH” “YEAH OK IT WAS PROBABLY A FENDER-BENDER BESIDES CAN FRANK DO THIS (PULLS BEATING HEART OUT OF CHEST) ” “OMG (VOMITS) ” ------ “GOOD MORNING BOSS MY APOLO...